Lay Down with Agony
by jaywolf27
Summary: Dean & Castiel are in love with each other, but it's only the beginning. This story follows their burgeoning relationship and parallels a strange mystery that might involve one or both of them. AU, Dean/Cas slash.


Notes: I do not know own the characters of Dean Winchester and Castiel from "Supernatural." I simply love them (even more as a couple). This story takes place in an AU of the show, whereas I do not follow the current storyline. This chapter focuses mainly on Dean and Cas. Others will appear as I continue. That is, if my readers choose that to be so. Also, this is my first fan fic, so please be kind (but critical where warranted). I also am unsure of where this story is going, so any suggestions will be considered as well as reviews that suggest I continue. Please keep in mind this is a slash story. Thank you.

"Lay Down with Agony"

Dean Winchester felt the icy flakes gently touch his skin, waking him from his rather pleasant dream. He was with Castiel again. They were wrapped in an intimate embrace, Dean's head resting on Cas's shoulder. He could still feel the heat radiating from his body, which now aided in keeping Dean warm. He looked around and, for a moment, forgot himself. Where was he? What was this place? His eyes focused on his bleak surroundings to find tall pines and a mixture of brush and bushes. The dark thicket before him, not more than forty feet, seemed ominous and forbade entrance, even for his eyes. More snowflakes touched him, and woke him further from the receding spell and into reality. He was sitting up with his back against a tree; his legs sprawled out before him. He attempted to move, but moaned out with the painful shock of movement. Looking down he realized he had a knife wound on his right side, and although it seemed superficial, it hurt like hell.

His mind was blank, save for a few hazy, black and white images. Nothing made sense so he blocked his brain's attempt to recollect. Dean could remember, rather vividly, what he was last doing. Or, should he say, who he was doing. He and Cas had finally connected, intimately. Dean could remember gazing into Cas's probing eyes, like two islands inviting a weekend, possibly eternal, getaway. The world had disappeared around him and he couldn't truly explain what or how it happened, but Dean's lips literally fell onto Cas's own. They were soft, but firm, and tender. A slow burn that felt good and unimaginably satisfying. He remembered feeling a strange tingling, almost like something was bubbling inside and yearning to burst free. It strengthened within seconds and before Dean knew it, he was here.

"Fuck," Dean grunted matter-of-factly, after failing to stand up. The pain on his side intensified and sent his heart racing with such rapidity that he thought he was going to have a heart attack. After a few moments of sudden fear, it passed and, in a stranger moment, he was miraculously unhurt. Dean felt all the pain fade from his body. It was heavenly. Divine. Was he dying?

"You're not dying, Dean," a low masculine voice said, "I saved you." Dean looked up and blinked. Castiel, outlined by the sun's rays peeking through the treetops, stood before him with a devastatingly gorgeous smile that was possibly brighter than the sun. Dean smiled and shut his eyes, as if thanking God for this amazing creature.

"You're a sight for sore eyes, Cas," Dean said accepting Cas's hand and allowing him to be pulled to his feet. The pain in his side was gone, as was the wound. "Can you tell me what happened?"

"I'm too much for you, Dean," Cas said with a smile, wrapping his left arm around Dean's side to steady him and then allowing him to walk solo. "At the moment of our kiss, as wonderful as it was for me, I knew it would be too much for you. I tried to hold back, but, I got carried away. A little."

"I don't understand," Dean said finally able to walk alone.

"In this human body, I am mortal and can both enjoy mortal pleasures and mortal pains," Cas said slowly, but concisely. "The angelic soul is suppressed, both in its power and passion. This vessel cannot possibly contain all of me, so I have to compartmentalize. Part of me is here on earth, with you and everyone. The other part is back in heaven. It's a little hard to explain, but it's the only way an angel can inhabit a human body."

"In other words," Dean said, crossing over the words in his mind, despite the fog, "you're in two places at the same time?"

"Yes," Cas said, a bit relieved at Dean's understanding. "I split my conscious between heaven and earth. My corporeal form is about ten times the human size. Therefore, it remains in a sort of stasis or temporary sleep. Undisturbed by God's grace, I can remain like that for a very long time."

"How long?"

"For your entire life, Dean," Cas said smiling, wrapping his arm around his love. "Time is irrelevant to angels. We don't measure life; we measure love, obedience and loyalty. Life is, well, only meaningful to those here. That's why many angels choose to come down and be amongst humans. To feel alive. To feel disconnected. Strange as it may sound, but being connected to a powerful entity can become overwhelming. Especially, when you have tasted the freedom granted upon you and your world."

"But, why did your kiss nearly kill me?"

"Because I reconnected to my heaven conscious," Cas said, "Unfortunately, upon doing so, I became too powerful. My passion consumed the inner part of this body and acted like a lightning rod. Juiced up and nowhere to go but out. Into you." Cas smiled and dropping his arm, instead opting to clasp his hand with Dean's.

Dean was silent for a minute, causing Cas to gaze over at him several times. Dean had to think about this. If they truly wanted to be together, would it kill him? Could love actually kill? Even when both are entirely willing to collapse into one?

It was too much for Dean to think about. He tried to push it out of his head, but it insisted. It was like one of those cloying songs that play incessantly in your head; sometimes the whole thing, sometimes just the chorus or the parts you remember. Dean knew and accepted the song this time. It was playing start to finish, with the chorus playing a significantly larger part. He finally came to a conclusion. Strange as it came, it was relieving.

"I love you, Cas," Dean said matter-of-factly, though he knew he had given it much thought. Dean stopped and faced Cas. Each other's eyes met and kept. "More than anyone I have ever loved. I mean, I love Sam and of course my parents, may they rest in peace. You, however, you are something else entirely."

"Perhaps, Dean, you're much wiser than I had imagined," Cas said after a beat or two. Dean's forehead creased in both confusion and resentment. Cas kissed Dean's hand that was held with his own and chuckled quietly. "I didn't mean it that way. I imagined you to be quite superficial with your emotions. Your superficiality is actually your greatest weakness. Everyone- angel, demon, and human- can see you wear your heart on your sleeve and it bleeds with your family's name, as well as those closest to you. It's an honorable, but liable quality. I love that about you. It's what draws me to you."

They came to the edge of a gravel road. Somber pines and other foliage lined the ten-foot wide pathway. The tallest trees created a canopy casting an eerie, misty glow about the well-worn trail. Cas motioned for Dean to stop next to him. Before Dean knew what was happening, they were on a sidewalk somewhere close by. He looked up and recognized the Twenty Pines Motel.

The motel was sprawled against a dark background of tall pines. If counted, it would be twenty to the number. An L-shaped pattern set up nearly fifty years ago, the place had been through many owners and renters, yet managed to maintain a semblance of respectability. The dark wood gave forewarning, but maybe that was only because Dean always expected something to go wrong. Passing by the "vacancy" sign, he could hear the steady buzz of the neon lights.

Cas led him to room 8 and waited. Dean stopped, unsure of what to do next. Why were they here? Was this where they were last night? Cas smiled and motioned for Dean to enter.

"I don't have a key," Dean said plainly.

"It's in your left pocket," Cas said with a slight smile. Dean touched his pocket, found his wallet, and then discovered a key wedged against it. He pulled it out and sure enough it was a motel key for room 8. He walked up to the door and let them in.

That's all I've got for now. Let me know what you think.


End file.
